Erotic Story:
ON THE B - JOB
When I set out for Philly,
to see my comedy coach, I had no idea that this simple business
trip would end in an adventure so bizarre that it would be a long
time before I could forget about it. And who knows if I ever WILL
forget about it? It may have irrevocably changed my life for all
time.
Well I don't want to keep you in suspense so I'll get right to the
point, that is, the story.
I am a standup comic, working with a damn good and damn expensive
comedy writer in the City of Brotherly Love. You know, the town in
which the movie with Tom Hanks took place. Yeah, that one! Well I
had concluded my business there and it was time for me to return
to New York City where I live. I started out about five PM, early
enough for me to get back to New York before sunset [I hate
driving in the dark]. I went up John F Kennedy Blvd, right on
North Broad St, then onto I-676 to the Vine Street Expressway, and
was just about to get onto I-95 towards Trenton, when I heard this
noise behind me, a quickly moving motorcycle coming up. I looked
in the mirror and saw it was a state trooper. I pulled over and
stopped and waited for him to come over. He dismounted and walked
over to the driver side while I rolled down my window. He came
over to the window and I already was pulling out my wallet to give
him my license.
"Is there some problem, officer?", I asked. He looked at my
license through his dark sunglasses and looked at me. "Well you
tell me, Rick", he said. "Do you know the speed limit on this
road?" I nodded. "Yes sir! It's 55."
"Well then, tell me Rick. Why did I clock you at 56?" I winced! I
couldn't fucking believe what I was hearing! Silently I mouthed,
"56 miles an hour? For one god-damn mile above the limit you
stopped me?" He must have seen my lips moving because the next
words out of his mouth were, "What's that? You say something,
Rick? You got something on your mind about the way I am doing my
job? Speak up, boy!" Well I don't have to tell you that when you
are 39 years old, being called a "boy" by an officer of the law is
no fun. In fact, it's a downright bad indication for the rest of
the day! So I gulped and said, "No sir, officer! I didn't say
anything."
"That's good, Rick. That's real good. Because I wouldn't want you
or any other citizen to think that a man of my experience, who has
been on the job for almost 20 years, who is almost getting ready
to retire, doesn't know how to do his job properly!" Then he
added, "Do we understand each other, boy?" I nodded. "Yessir!", I
said. " I certainly DO understand. And I want you to know that I
don't mean any trouble. I didn't know that I was speeding. I'm
sorry! Listen officer, I have to get back to New York real soon,
before dark. You see, I don't do very well driving at night."
to read the rest of the story
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